This post was written for inclusion in the April Carnival of Natural Mothering.
Dear Mama to Be:
Congratulations! You got some amazing, wonderful news today! In eight months, give or take, you’re going to become a mother! All you want to do is shout out your glad news to your family, your friends, your co-workers, your clients, and strangers on the street, but you’re going to (mostly) keep it to yourself until your second trimester. Don’t worry, mama, everything will be fine with this pregnancy.
Nothing anybody says can possibly prepare you for the transformation you are about to go through. You don’t know it yet, but all the things you thought were important are about to take a back seat to the microscopic passenger inside you. Your insistence that you’ll never be a stay at home mom will fade away as you start to feel the new life move and grow within you.
You’re going to feel a new empathy for the women you work with at the maternity hospital. You’ll understand in a completely new way how devastated these pregnant women are at the possible loss of their babies. Because even though you haven’t met her yet, you’d give your life for her.
And just wait for that moment when you find out you’re having a little girl! While you’re staring at the ultrasound on the screen, nodding wisely like you understand everything the technician is pointing out, she’ll say, “I’m pretty sure that’s a girl in there,” and you’ll experience an overwhelming rush of love and joy. The tears will stream down your face without you even being aware of it.
You’ll set out to learn everything there is to know about fetal development and the stages of labour, yet you’ll be completely unprepared when the moment actually comes. Everything you’ll read will lead you to expect to go past your due date and experience a long, drawn out labour, but surprise! Things won’t go as you expected or planned.
And when you finally meet your new daughter, you’re going to fall in love in a way you could never explain to someone else. Paradoxically you’ll feel more powerful and more vulnerable than you’ve ever felt in your life, all at the same time. You are a superwoman who’s created a tiny, perfect life, and now you’ll be hostage to the safety and happiness of this little one for the rest of your life. Get ready for an entirely new life, mama. You’re about to be reborn, and things will never be even remotely the same.
All my love, Me
What do you wish you could say to your younger self?
I read Tee’s birth story – wow! How amazingly strong you must be to be in transition and think it’s early labor! I also wanted a natural, drug-free birth, but I had to be induced when labor did not start naturally more than 12 hours after my water broke. Thanks for sharing!
Thanks, Donna! I was more panicking because if that was early labour for sure I wouldn’t be able to do it. (The second time around was much easier since I knew the difference!)
So sweet!
Beautifully put. I remember thinking how much control I had but really you are constantly on your knees, weak with love and exhaustion and hoping every move you make is right. What an insane ride. 🙂
That’s exactly it, Brooke! What a powerful way of putting it. Thanks!
Beautiful letter! I love how you focused on the changes that pregnancy and birth bring. Everyone tells you what to expect, but unless you are there, in the moment, you don’t quite believe them.
My little one just turned one. I also never thought I would be a SAHM mom, but I am! I love it! I do not miss the demanding corporate world at all.
Thanks, Katie! I don’t think you ever believe them until all of a sudden you find yourself there. LOL, I never thought I’d stay home with kids, but they suckered me in!
No things will never be the same! 🙂 What a cute picture!
So true, Brittney. Thanks!